Bit of a longer one this week, buckle your seat belts, kids.
So, it turns out mental health is a pretty big deal, huh?
Who woulda thunk it?
My previous post, Crafting to Contentment, was my most popular upload of HT to date! So thank you very much!
After the success of the last blog post, I thought I would keep the positive mental vibes flowing.
I think some people tend to get so caught up in life and misunderstand their priorities and forget that mental health should be up at the top.
Did you know that one of the most recent Psychaitric Morbidity Surveys indicates that approximately 6million people in the UK are living with mental health issues (approx 3m with depression as the root and 3m with anxiety) and only 25% of all those people are currently receiving treatment. You ain't alone.
It's easy to get caught up in a new or existing job during the New Year. I think people get a big spurt of energy and motivation around New Year and vow to do harder at work, to get a new job and work their way up the ladder, get earning those disgusting plastic notes we call money. You use up all of your energy in the first month and there is no spare enthusiasm left for the rest of the year. People spread themselves too thin.
Perhaps you've been doing a lot more overtime or picked up a few extra shifts.
Don't get me wrong at all, it is great that we get the motivation to begin with and are so dedicated to stick to it, we disregard everything else.
Being a grown up sucks. Having responsibility for yourself, and sometimes even other tiny humans, is terrifying! - and bloody hard work.
~Quick shout out to all the single mammas, and pappas out there absolutely slaying it. (If I were cooler, this is where I'd be saying "You da real MVP" but I'm not cool.)~
So anyway, this week, I want to focus on ways to treat yo' self a little bit.
If it is a whole weekend, a day to yourself, an hour, or even five minutes of you time. I want to find something for you where you can just chill out, not worry, feel a bit more content and generally just feel a bit more positive in a healthy, happy way!
This week, I have been lucky enough to feature an amazing blogger, and old school friend from the shire end, Georgina!
I'll let her introduce herself...
"I'm Georgina, blogger at Disabled Travel with Georgina https://disabledtravelwithgeorgina.blogspot.com/
I have complex chronic health problems and disabilities that started around 4 years ago. It was a harsh transition for me since I was born able-bodied and had to adapt to being a full-time wheelchair user. It had a huge impact on my mental health and I have severe depression, anxiety and panic attacks. It has taken me a while but I'm in a much better place in terms of my mental health and I am always happy to share any experiences and tips that might be helpful for others!"
I asked what her prefect self-care day would be:
"I think my perfect self-care day would perhaps vary depending on my current mood and the state of my mental health at the time. If I was feeling particularly anxious or had experienced panic attacks then I would favour activities that grounded me in the present moment such as blogging or doing some form of craft. If my depression was flaring then I would try to surround myself with those I love such as my partner, friends, family or dog Milo. I love crafting to help my mental health and am particularly enjoying needle felting and sculpting with limo clay at the moment. I make a lot of handmade gifts for my family and friends so they are fun projects to dip into. Depending on how my spinal cord pain is, I can be lifted into a bath and I particularly enjoy just switching off with a book in the bath if I am feeling low."
I think Georgina and myself have very much the same idea when it comes to grounding/immersing yourself in something positive like crafts. I can't even begin to explain how much crafting has helped my mental health!
Although, I must admit, even I sometimes find myself and my mental health getting bad again.
I quite often suffer from anxiety and panic attacks - luckily, they're quite mild most of the time but I have had some unbelievable attacks in the past. I am the absolute worst for overthinking situations. I have a very very over active imagination - which I will admit, did make university and my Creative Writing degree! However, in a lot of my day to day situations, my overthinking only end up hurting me more - and for no good reason!
I'll give you an example. I quite often message my mum on Whatsapp throughout the day for various things. Sometimes I'll ask for a recipe or how to cook something, sometimes she will catch me up on family news, but more often than not it's just to chat. We tend to text more than voice call. Anyway, one day we were just messaging like normal, and she sent a message simply saying something like "Can I call you later? xxx"
Immediately, my brain went crazy. It's like receiving the "We need to talk." text. Of course she then left her phone at home while she walked the dog. For almost two hours I was trying to call her wondering why she wanted to call and what had happened. I eventually wound myself up so much that my heart was pounding, rapid breathing, sweating, shaking, crying - typical bad attack for me. But I'd convinced myself that my cat had died and she didn't know how to tell me. I was an absolute blubbering mess just because my own brain had decided that the worst possible situation was definitely the reality.
Of course, she only wanted to call up and see how a house viewing we went to had gone...
Now, obviously, I let my emotions and irrational brain get the better of me in that situation, but there are things you can do when you feel yourself unravelling. A lot of the techniques for helping anxiety is grounding. Grounding is basically a technique where, when you are aware that your brain is spiralling, you focus only on the present, where you are, who you are, what you can hear, see, feel, smell, taste. If you purposefully refocus your brain on the elements around you, you will be surprised how quickly you can placate yourself. It's basically a way to bring your focus to your physical status, to what is happening around you in your surroundings or physically.
Georgina also uses this method when she's feeling overwhelmed.
"A really great technique for panic attacks or anxiety is grounding. For me, I try to notice something in that moment for each of the five senses (touch, sight, smell, sound, taste) as that returns you to that present moment. Mindfulness is a really great thing to look into if you're struggling but be prepared to give it a good try over a few weeks as not many people feel the benefits of things like meditation or relaxation immediately. YouTube has some fab mindfulness resources or there is an app called Headspace that helps guide beginners."
Other grounding techniques can include:
Put your hands in cold water - it helps you focus on the temperature and the feelings around your hands.
Take a minute or two to just close your eyes and listen to every single thing you hear around you. Maybe you hear the hustle and bustle of a busy city where everyone is going about their lives, or maybe it's a low hum of an air conditioning unit. This helps you get out of your own head.
Just stop and take a minute to focus on the sensations of your own body, your breathe, if you're holding any tension anywhere, do you feel comfortable.
Some people find it calms them to do mental arithmetic or recite lyrics to a song or quotes from films.
Having an anchoring phrase can help, eg "My name is XXX, I am XX years old. I live in XXXX. It is 11am. I am okay." and repeating it.
Have a look online for more grounding techniques, there are TONS!
"I think finding your own warning signs and triggers is really important to help bounce yourself back slightly before you get drastically low. For me, I really benefitted from therapy and this is available for free on the NHS so it's definitely worth talking to your GP about. I also take medication to help my mental health and there is such a stigma about this. Personally, I think of mental health as very similar to physical health since there is a literal imbalance in chemicals and receptors in your brain. You wouldn't ignore physical pain and avoid tablets so it's definitely worth talking to your GP about medication if it could help you. Reaching out for help shows real strength and struggling mentally does not make you weak or lesser than other people. Everyone goes through tough patches in they life, some more than others, so it's just about how you deal with that and reaching out for help is the bravest thing you can do."
Touching on Georgina's point on the free therapy from the NHS, I can absolutely agree. It is easy to self refer for CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy - this is basically trying to understand why you think the way you do, and how to basically condition your brain to stop before it goes crazy and spirals. There are so many groups that have been set up by organisations and even just groups who get together to talk and help promote positive mental health.
So kids, what have we learnt from today's lesson?
If you have been diagnosed with any sort of mental illness, or haven't even been diagnosed but really feel like any of this could relate to you, there are ways to get through the storm. Just think about the sunshine on the other side.
If you've got any other grounding tricks that work for you, please let me know!
Huge thank you to Georgina for helping out and talking so openly! You're a warrior woman, yaaaaaaas!
Keep it cool, cats.
Peace & love,
H.T.
**If you still feel totally alone or that you can't really talk to those around you, here's a list of just a handful numbers & websites that may help:
Anxiety Helpline:
Phone: 03444 775 774 (Monday to Friday, 9.30am to 5.30pm)
Website: www.anxietyuk.org.uk
Bipolar Helpline:
Website: www.bipolaruk.org.uk
CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably - for men ages 18-35:
Phone: 0800 58 58 58 (daily, 5pm to midnight)
Website: www.thecalmzone.net
No Panic:
Voluntary charity offering support for sufferers of panic attacks and obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). Offers a course to help overcome your phobia or OCD.
Phone: 0844 967 4848 (daily, 10am to 10pm). Calls cost 5p per minute plus your phone provider's Access Charge
Website: www.nopanic.org.uk
Papyrus:
Young suicide prevention society.
Phone: HOPElineUK 0800 068 4141 (Monday to Friday, 10am to 5pm and 7pm to 10pm, and 2pm to 5pm on weekends)
Website: www.papyrus-uk.org
Samaritans:
Phone: 116 123 (free 24-hour helpline)
Website: www.samaritans.org.uk
And for more information and details to other organisations, follow this link to the NHS List of Mental Health Helplines.
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